the ugly person

I see that mask, the one you wear,
don't bother asking me why I stare.
The one your wrapped around your head
because you lost your humanity, you've gone dead.
Go ahead and play it fake
putting on that thing was your biggest mistake.
you are now lost behind that ugly mask
and pretending to be you will be your biggest task
You put it on with your head held high,
as I watched a part of you die.
That mask I have to look at you don't see
the ugly person you have come to be

The Monster in Me

It's taking control. It's inside of me.
Don't make it mad or set it free.
Allow it to rest and don't let it wake
for that will be your biggest mistake.

Don't try to save me for it is within
its deep beneath my bruised up skin.
It holds me hostage from deep inside,
it brings out the me that I try to hide.

When it comes out, a truth shines through
a side of me that you thought you knew.
Just leave it alone, and let it be.
Don't agitate the monster in me.

I've Tried

Robbed from the experiences that I'll never get.
Sitting here wishing, and full of regret.
They've given up on me, they don't know what to do.
They've lost the girl that they once knew.
He wasn't just my dad, he was my best friend.
How was I supposed to know that his life would end?
Staying strong for others, while I am dying inside.
Driven to depression, and suicide.
Pretending isn't helpful, it's just getting by
strength is being able to cry.
Not allowing myself to get rid of this pain,
for without it the memories wont be the same.
Barley scratching the surface of this tragedy
for not getting over it, they are mad at me.
I too want this pain to subside,
trust me its very hard, I know because I've tried.

Consistency

All the chaos that surrounds me,
my one consistency is you.
My thoughts are bound by your smile,
and they can't evade what you put me through.

I cling to the hope that when you are near,
you feel the same impression that I do.
The impression for my need,
and knowing that what I want is you.

When you leave my side,
in my thoughts you manage to falter.
You give me a break from the insanity,
My hectic life you seem to alter.